Great TV - Masters of Horror (part one)

Great TV shows: Masters of Horror (Series 1, Vol.1)

Masters of Horror was an anthology style TV show that started airing in the US in 2005. Created by Mick Garris, of multiple Stephen King adaptations fame, the show invited famous horror directors to direct unrelated hour-long TV movies in the vein of classic shows like Tales From The Crypt or Night Gallery. Unlike the EC Comics style of ...Crypt though, there's no morality, and rarely a twist, these are just pretty cool little horror movies.

I heard of Masters of Horror after catching John Carpenter's Cigarette Burns whilst flicking channels one night, I think it was on Bravo, that manliest of stations. After learning more about it, I was pretty gutted to find that you could only get Cigarette Burns and Dreams In The Witch House on a double pack for about £20. All the others were single film edition DVD's from the US.

Imagine my surprise when I walked into my local secondhand shop about 4 months later and found the first three volumes of the collected films for £10 each! £30 later, you've got one happy Mav. Over the next couple of weeks I devoured these, watching one or two a night, always starting at 10pm. Don't ask me why, it seemed like a good idea at the time. I got the fourth volume from Amazon for about £15, and completed my collection.

The DVD's are brilliantly put together, with top notch picture quality, full DTS 5.1 or stereo options, and most discs contain a 30 minute or so 'Making of' documentary, as well as written or filmed profiles of the directors. It's one film to a disc, so there's no cramming and compressing involved. Good stuff.

Anyway, on to the point of this blog, I thought I'd give you all a little break down of what episodes are in each volume, let you know my thoughts on the film itself and my feelings on that particular "Master of Horror".

Please note that the films in the box sets aren't necessarily in the order in which they aired originally.

So, I present Masters of Horror: Series One, the first seven films....

Film 1: Cigarette Burns by John Carpenter (Halloween, The Thing)

What a bonkers film. John Carpenter's tale of suicide, insanity, snuff films, murder, obsession, this one's got it all. Featuring genre legend Udo Kier (the notorious Blood for Dracula, Shadow of the Vampire, Suspiria) in a supporting role as an obsessed film collector trying to track down a film, 'La Fin Absolut du Monde', which was reported to have caused a riot/killing spree at it's one and only showing. As we follow the main protagonist, a cinema owner in heavy debt, trying to track down the film, we encounter everyone left alive who has seen it, and surprise! They've all gone mad and/or homicidal. It's a pretty good introduction to the show, and doesn't feel like a TV show at all, the film is so rich, it's literally dripping with mood.
Whilst not the best episode, it's definitely up there.
My rating? 4/5

Film 2: Dreams In The Witch House by Stuart Gordon (Re-animator, Dagon)

If you thought it would be quite tame as it's on TV, watch this one and think again. Trust Stuart Gordon to ramp up that gore. Not exactly known for his suspense work, he takes a story by the original Master of Horror, H.P. Lovecraft, and applies it to a modern setting. This ones got some really out-there stuff going on, with anthropomorphic rats, a creepy-ass witch, baby sacrifices and a literally mental ending. Nice little nod to the Miskatonic University as well. My rating? 5/5

Film 3: Incident On and Off a Mountain Road by Don Coscarelli (Phantasm, Bubba HoTep)

Don Coscarelli, who will always be a legend to me purely for Phantasm, heads up this take on the stalker/slasher movie, and even drops in an deformed killer for us 80's fans. A woman has a car crash, gets chased through the woods (lucky she's had survivalist training from her husband!), ends up at the creepy cabin, so far, ticking all them genre boxes. Add in a crazy man (played by none other than Phantasm's Tall Man, Angus Scrimm) and some very nifty gore shots, and you've got an average slasher movie with some fanboy winks. Whilst kudos is due for a decent (and unexpected) ending, it's still by the numbers.
My rating? 3/5






Film 4: Chocolate by Mick Garris (every Stephen King TV movie known to man)

Mick Garris knows how to work for television, that's for sure. This episode looks just lovely. Like a summers day. Starring EELLLLIIIIOOOOOTTTT himself, Henry Thomas, this story revolves around a man with an exceptional palate who begins to feel and experience life through a mystery woman's eyes whenever he tastes chocolate. With me so far? She also happens to be a bit messed up in the head and kills folk. Whilst it sounds really odd, it actually works quite well, and Garris' work on umpteen Stephen King adaptations has obviously given him an eye for characterisation and descriptive technique. Massively underwhelming on paper, for me, this was the standout film of this set, mainly because it's just so elegant. Look out for the cameo from 80's legend Max Headroom as well. My rating? 5/5

Film 5: Sick Girl by Lucky Mckee (May, The Woods)

Lucky McKee? A Master of Horror? Really? With only one decent film to his name (the excellent May) I was a bit wary going in to this one. I shouldn't have been, it's awesome. Quirky characters, tongue in cheek body horror (it's no Cronenberg), lesbians (always a winner in horror), some really quite impressive effects by masters KNB studios and a really, really tight script, McKee goes toe to toe with his peers. An insect obsessed entomologist receives a package from Brazil containing a new species of parasitic insect. Turns out it likes to infect things and alter their DNA. As you can tell, hilarity ensues. A top notch little film, and a nice look at the self-aware side of horror. My rating? 4/5

Film 6: Deer Woman by John Landis (American Werewolf in London, Coming to America)

A pretty odd tale of sex and North American mythology, Deer Woman is an ultimately forgettable entrance to the series from movie legend John Landis. The tale of a tortured detective attempting to investigate a series of bizarre deaths is let down by some paper-thin supporting characters and a monster of the week X-Files style plot, which ranks up there with the weakest ones from that show. The film has it's good moments, one of which is the eponymous Deer Woman of the title, who is (a) stupid hot and (b) brings enough mysteriousness to the role to be interesting, but I couldn't help feel that this was by the numbers Tales From The Crypt style TV, and was not in the same league as the episodes viewed so far. One neat thing though, keep an ear out for a little nod to Landis' seminal An American Werewolf in London. It was pretty nifty. Apart from that though, not much going on. Must try harder Landis.
My rating? 2/5

Film 7: Homecoming by Joe Dante (Gremlins, The Howling)

Aah, Joe Dante. What a guy. A literal walking encyclopedia of cult film knowledge, through his early days in the Roger Corman film school to his later years now running the awesome Trailers From Hell website, this man loves a good tongue in cheek horror movie. And whilst this is one, he's also making a very serious political statement. To sum it up simply, dead soldiers are reanimating into flesh-eating ghouls, sorry, disgruntled voters. Yep, voters. Whilst this all sounds quite silly, Dante's actually making his feelings about the then Bush administration's war policies public. And he's pretty pissed. The politicians are shown to be cold, inhuman killing machines, whilst the zombies are calm, collected, reasonable and intelligent. After some Cheney style underhandedness, it all gets a bit rowdy and the zombies make their point again.Whilst I didn't really dig this at first, on a second viewing I appreciated all the little parallels with the Bush presidency and it's war on terror/playground bullying. Definitely a lot more going on in this than first meets the eye. Dante fans, keep an eye out for Robert Picardo, of Innerspace and The Howling fame as a more evil Dick Cheney.
                                                              My rating? 4/5.

So there you have it, my thoughts on the first Masters of Horror box set. Next week, I'll go through the remainder of Season One, which features such heavy hitters as Dario Argento, Tobe Hooper and the quite mental Takashi Miike. Unfortunately, it also contains the biggest turd of the series. But which one is it?